This is no way an attack on your advice, just a question from a curious reader. Reply I don't know where to start, my ex threw me out 2 months ago after his ex contacted him again after she ghosted him. If youre in the midst of a no contact rule, which includes time frames of 21 days, 30 days, and 45 days, you may be sitting and thinking that you should respond back to your ex. Have the HARDEST TIME with the love of my life!. After reading a few stories here and elsewhere, I note a lot of exes will reopen the lines of communication, after this time period has elapsed..2 to 3 months. This is something Ive been championing for years, but no one else talks about it. I would tread carefully & go in heartless of affection for her.. Anyway, a week prior to him breaking up with me I noticed him becoming distant and aloof, so I got a feeling something was up. "Hey. One more day and you are really worried. If that makes any sense. It just seems like you aren't giving a lot of detail I don't know. So after 5 months of no contact my ex who im deeply inlove with contacts me My ex-GF texted me after 7 months of no contact? Forever dwelling in the realm of possibility and curiosity. He wanted to work it out with me in couples therapy, but after one session and my hurt feelings, I couldnt bear to stay with a man who said he fell out of love and suggested that I start wearing make-up and lose weight. We talked a lot about how we felt and how we werent happy with ourselves individually. I begged and pleaded for a few days then went NC. We have had daily contact mostly from him but he has gone back to this girl and its like nothing happened between us. If you wanted to get back together, play hard to get! Can Breaking Up Strengthen A Relationship? Girls love attention, it is what they really want. The next day I found out from a good friend who's wife hangs out with the ex telling me my ex is having a hard time recently because she found out I started to date other girls and have been hanging out with one in particular lately. If you don't want them back, make it clear to them and discontinue contact. That's just my opinion. Basically she just wants to know if your still on her mind. Therefore it is your ex who needs to move toward you since they were the one who pulled away. EMOTIONALLY CONNECT WITH YOUR EX. But 2 months ago she left again! I was just looking at some pics of us a week ago. Reason #7: Your Ex-Boyfriend is Now Single And Wants to Get Back in Touch. Is there anything else i can do? Men, like women, can get sentimental. Her contacting you after 2 months is pretty much the same. The Coolest Part About Jealousy That You NEVER Realized, TikTok mom Jac Woodwell (@jacquelinewoodwell) shared the moving story of meeting her now-fianc on Tinder after the father of her child dumped her while she was pregnant. This means that the chances of your ex reaching out are 90.7%. I feel like he didnt really want to initiate a conversation, yet he felt a need to reach out. i went no contact and didn't pay any attention to him. Give it up mate shes using you in case. Yangki, I agree with your take on no contact. Hi. Maybe after 2-3 months the dumper feels comfortable talking again? Hello, I am currently changing careers to become a data analyst and have recently received the "Google Data Analytics" certificate. If you have moved on then meet her but if you're still emotional involved and want her back DO NOT GO ON THAT LUNCH! next day i get a text. After years of trying to heal from what happened with us. I am needy with her because I want all of her time. I still want him back but dont know what do do. Your ex reaching out to you can trigger a lot of emotions and confusion, especially if you dont know why they want to talk to you or how you should respond. Thanks in Advance! SHE started asking, SHE wants to meet, SHE is interested in what your doing!! Attract Back An Avoidant Ex Pt. Leave it at that. i moved on and healed on my own, i didn't get an apology or closure. After months of radio silence, my ex began liking my Instagram posts again. I think maybe I am too jealous and possessive? What were looking for is the second kind of message. 3 months late My ex broke contact. Your email address will not be published. Doing so can help you understand what kind of chance you may have with your ex and from there you can make an informed decision on whether or not its a good idea to continue. 2. Ultimate objective is either friendship, relationship or nothing. If your relationship was healthy and blossomed from an existing friendship, staying in contact can still prove tricky, as you may have already created space in your brain for this person romantically. 7 Instances When You Should Respond To Your Ex Quickly Dont Wait! However, we work together so basically we have to see each other everyday. She distanced herself from you, and wasn't interested in interacting with you. 2 months NC exactly. Twice I did the dumping and once I was dumped. 5. You are doing this to yourself. Why would she do that? I dated My gf broke up with me 9 months ago, we havent talked in 5 months until she contacted me. Ive also seen people fail to get their ex back not because their ex didnt want them back but because of their panicky words and actions. They want you back. Seems like you both had a lot going on before---you were too needy at one point for her attention and she has 2 kids and 2 jobs. What you do from this point on is what will determine whether she gets more into you or pulls away for good. For the sake of future correctness here's what should happen. They then miss you and want to get back in touch with you. Perhaps you both can consider going to counseling together and see if you can work on your communication skills and see if things can improve between you both. Now he slides me DMs and calls me cute names, likes my posts even if it was 2 years old. 37,374. Him wanting to have emotional talks shows that he is still feeling from the break up. Mine only contacts me once No contact for 4 months- my ex has apparently fallen off the earth, No contact 2 months and now she contacts me. Relationship is the ultimate objective. Im in NC and its just day 4 and im planning to follow it to the end. NOT ROMANTIC. I tried to end the relationship on a good and respectful note as much as possible I noticed that she also was hiding her stories from me right after the breakup because i . If it is not the case, below are reasons why she is contacting you several weeks or months after the two of you broke up. 8 things to do when an ex contacts you years later. We didnt get too personal it was more of like a friend thing or feeling each other out. We had a talk and he broke up with me, and I actually handled it very well. Privacy Policy. But you need to remember that clearly this woman has a lot of responsibility and even without the second job she will still be swamped. If it isnt then at least I can know she is happy and one day move on but after 35 years and many girls she has been the best so I dont think I will ever forget her. "Does your wife know that you're talking to . Our relationship turned out toxic, I believe he is a Narcissist, I stayed with him for 4 years believing all his lies, thinking he would change for me. You should consider replying to your ex is: If all these boxes are checked, its time for you to strike an organic conversation, preferably one about something that interests him! I think it takes men longer to realize what a nice relationship they had, especially if the guy left you because he has commitment issues. Remember you both were crazy about each other once! Secondly this whole site is THE alternative to no contact. major and doing research on resilience, disengagement strategies and post-breakup emotional adjustment. Nothing changed, so I let her go. Going forward you need to be sure that you do not give him any intimacy without a relationship. Meditate twice daily for at least 15 minutes So far, so good - but it's bloody hard work! Help! Is it too late to initiAte no contact after 2 months of begging for my ex t NC for 4 months, ex didn't send me a text call or Anything for my Bday, tog My ex contacts me after 3 months of no contact, No contact for 4 months- my ex has apparently fallen off the earth. Hi, My ex recently contacted me again. After years of not speaking. Twice I did the dumping and once I was dumped. Didn't think much of it and then I responded a couple days later saying thanks and how is life. I: What? They usually come back around the 2-3 month mark, which is how long it takes for them to realize that you are not coming back. Does anyone else find it really odd that a lot of exes will return and around two to three months after the initial split? I mean NC, even though weve changed, weve done self-reflect, and solved all of that bad things on the inside like you mentioned on you article. He reached out within the 30 day time frame I had but I didnt respond not until I completed the no contact rule. We had no contact for 30 days prior to this. He told me it was the biggest regret of his life and he loved me still but couldnt be in a relationship. Hi Lisa, this can be so hurtful and heartbreaking. Ill have been in NC for 30 days by the end of this week. Stage 4, in the stages of no contact for the dumper, is fear. no reconciliation, never, ever, no matter how much he changes his ways. I assume you're referring to how long it takes for a dumper to re-establish contact with a dumpee? Didn't beg, just told her to think about it for the rest of the day. Reddit and its partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide you with a better experience. Day 4 NC My ex broke up with me 2 months ago, NC for 18 days then I broke i MY EX CONTACTED ME AFTER MONTHS OF ME GOING NC! Should I text her 6 months after No Contact? Your email address will not be published. This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies. He reached out again the next day about something unrelated to our relationship and that was it. I stil love him and im trying to stop. The time I was dumped the 2 months it took him to contact me felt like an eternity but with the others, that I didn't want to be with, it felt like they were chasing me right away. But she also said if I fully commit myself to her she would bring me around him. So, a great response to a Hey could be Hey! My ex finally contacted me after 3 months of NCwhat do I do now? I think they come back and perhaps after long periods of time, not to reconcile, but most likely because they are feeling lonely or reminiscing and once they make contact and their curiosities satisfied, then off they gallavant again. Went no contact after he picked his stuff from our apartment. But when you add a high sensitivity to rejection, 3 days without contact from your ex, let alone 3 minutes feels like rejection. 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